::Beautiful is the New Black::

"I want to be beautiful

Make you stand in awe

Look inside my heart,

and be amazed

I want to hear you say

Who I am is quite enough

Just want to be worthy of love

And beautiful"

-Bethany Dillon "Beautiful"

I had just gotten out of the shower and threw on my robe and looked in the mirror and said to myself, "you look pretty." And then I realized that I have never said that to myself. I often look over my reflection and see all of the imperfections (the double chin, the zit that just popped up or my makeup that I couldn't get just right). And I realized in all of this criticalness that I'm sinning. Not only am I doubting Gods creation but I'm also incredibly insecure. Actually, I feel insecure writing this right now, wondering if those reading this will judge. But that is okay. I need to announce that all of God's creations are beautiful! And that may seem trite, or simplified, but it is true. I must bask in the truth that all of creation is beautiful, including me, and including YOU. So dear reader, please know that you are not alone in your insecurity. But God has made you exactly the way you are and only sees beauty.

Pink is not the new black, blue is not the new black, lets make beauty the new black.

::Adoption::

Since about late high school I have had this desire in the back parts of my heart. My desire is this.... to one day adopt and/or be a foster parent to a child. Or if God blesses me in this a multitude of children. Yes, I know children are very expensive, and time consuming. And if you know me at all, you also understand that I'm not very "children friendly". But I can't shake this desire that I have.

You may ask, "Do you have a particular choice of nationality, gender, or age?" And the answer is a big fat NOPE! I know God will bring to me exactly what He desires. I have no problem with younger, older, blacker, asianer, or what ever he has for me. A friend of mine recently shared her passion for the exact same thing, and she posed the question of Gods sovernty in bringing a man with the same desire. To be honest, I never thought about that. I know God will bring a man into my life that has the same passion, sooner or later.

So excuse my ramblings, but I have one last things to share.

I believe adoption makes me most excited due to the fact that I'm adopted. I'm adopted into the family of God. And let me tell you it is the best family out there. I have brothers and sisters who are of many different races and ages. It's pretty rad cause, I got a great dad. (That rhymed, unintentional.)

::Doing Hard Things::

I believe the fiery red-head, Lucille Ball, says it best, "In life, all good things come hard, but wisdom is the hardest to come by." Growing up has its difficulties, but for some reason recent generations of people forget that there will be times when 'hard things' must be done. I, myself, can be included in this recent generation.

I am learning a secret, the secret is that these 'hard things' may be one of the best things to happen to a person. It allows a person to understand that they cannot continue on by themselves. A person will fail if they do not rely on God. And God, in His infinite power, places specific people in a persons life to gain wisdom from.

So what 'hard things' are you dealing with? Financial issues, death of a loved one, failed test, medical issues.... the list can go on and on. I am learning that I must trust and have faith. I have a friend who continually tried to get me to understand what true faith was, and now going through 'hard things', I understand. This understanding has caused more joy than I have experienced in a long time. So in the end, I'm thankful for these 'hard things', as it has allowed faith and joy to abound! Praise Him.

So to encourage those few people who may stumble across this post..... Trust God, and perhaps those 'hard things' may be a blessing and not as impenetrable as they seem.

::World Citizen (and not the class)::

My eyes have been opened to my ignorance. I know that a statement like that can be considered dramatic, but my roommate T has shown me how limited my knowledge is regarding world news. As a world citizen I should be concerned about those who are hurting or in distress. But more importantly, as a Christ-follower I should be aware and be praying for those people around the world. Often I realize how selfish my prayer life has become and this has to change. And the first way to change it is to educate myself on the happenings of the world.

These are the recent things that I have learned:

• Egypt, specifically Cairo, is going through utter chaos. (Political unrest)
• The midwest had a major snowstorm hit (people have deemed it a snowpocalypse)
• Sex traffic increases due to the Superbowl (I find this to be so sad)
• Cyclone hits Queensland (To be honest, I'm not sure where Queensland is located)
• Japan's Mt.Shinmoe erupts (famous for being in a James Bond movie)

::The Sabbath::

Last night a friend warned me that we may be "blessed" with more inclement weather, and my first thought was "But that may cause me to miss church." And at the time it seemed perfectly normal, but today after pondering my response I was taken aback. When did I begin to feel so comfortable at my home church? Over the summer I joined the church I had been attending for about 3 years. I learned that I had to make a step and be part of the body. It would take me completely out of my comfort zone, as The Journey is very different than any church I had ever attended. I love seeing familiar and new smiles each week, and knowing that investing in peoples lives is what we are called to do. This week the sermon "How Can I Really Change?" , rocked my world. It challenged me to decide who I really want to call my master, my God or my flesh? Needless to say, my heart was moved. And all praise goes to God in this matter. I am thankful for my Church family and am excited to see how God will use me in this family.

"Love God. Connect People. Transform the World."

::Visions of Sugarplums?::

Tis the season for sleigh bells, cookies, and my favorite .....Presents! But in all honesty, I hate to receive them. When I receive them I feel like a ball of awkwardness...I mean I never know how to react. But what I love about presents is creating, wrapping and giving them. I get this overwhelming rush as I craft and wrap a present. Seeing all of the glue, glitter, paper and fabric being thrown around in a creative fashion gives me a high like none other....it is totally my drug. And I am in the season of my addiction....Christmas Season! So as my roommates tolerate my 'Sarah's Workshop' that has invaded the living and dining room, I can't help but smile as the thoughts of ribbon and mod podge dance through my head.

::Another Year::

I believe I've finally reached that point. You 'older' folks know what I'm talking about, that point where age has no real purpose. It seems like time now time is irrelevant. I have come to accept this concept. I think that in the back of my mind whenever my day of birth rolls around I will always ponder the 'good ole days' when birthdays consisted of pool parties and sleepovers.

Even though, I am lamenting over what is the past, I am super excited for what is to come.

Let me share some of the highlights of this years celebration:

• My fab coworkers (including the bestie) really made me feel special with balloons, the cutest cupcakes, a 'stepped up' sash, and lovely presents.
• I felt genuinely loved by friends as they showered me with well wishes.
• A really wonderful guy took me out to my favorite restaurant (Red Robin...YUM), saw some spectacular Christmas lights, then let me pick a girly movie to watch back home. It was pretty great!

I'm a pretty blessed girl! So thankful for a wonderful set of friends to celebrate this time with me.

::Shutterfly...spreadin' the Christmas Cheer::

My family is spread out all over the states which causes the holidays to be a little less joyful. I've wanted to find a way to connect them someway to all of the changes happening in my life and Shutterfly is offering just that! Shutterfly has some great designs for Christmas and I can't wait to wait send out some cards that show pictures of friends, family and accomplishments!

One design that I am oogling over is this....

I'm a sucker for black and white photos and I think this design would look great with them.

So spread some cheer yourself and check out Shutterfly!

And if you are a blogger and want to share some love with your friends and family you can receive 50 free cards just by blogging about it! Shutterfly loves bloggers!

::The Art of Being Thankful::

So often we are so focused in what we are doing we tend to forget to look at the bigger picture. I've heard it explained the best with the forest and tree analogy. You know, some people focus on the trees instead of the whole forest. The analogy takes me immediately to the smell of fresh pine trees, which in turn reminds me of Christmas and the holidays.

I think the tree analogy is great when thinking about thankfulness. I believe that God wants us to be thankful for the trees and the forest. What I mean by that is God wants us to be thankful for the small individual things He has blessed us with but also the larger view.

So here are just a few on my list:

Trees:

Each one of my friends

My Family

My Church

A roof over my head

Forest:

Forgiveness

The beauty of nature

Perseverance

:: The Coming of Home::

As a new grad it is only proper that I attend my first Homecoming as an alumni. This year Student Activities and the other various departments that contribute to Homecoming did a great job. I must confess it is odd to not be a student and take part like I use to. I saddens my heart a little that I couldn't be stressed out, running around, and surviving only on coffee last week, but I have to remember that God has moved me to a new part in life.

Some of the highlights of the wonderful 2010 Homecoming week:

• Seeing my bestie (and her partner) win the title of Mr. and Ms. Spirit MBU! (See the wonderful photo above taken by the wonderful Nicole)
• Watching the community come together at the Fall Family Carnival
• Watching the Lady Spartans dominate in Basketball
• Seeing our incredible students rock it out at The Perk : The Event!

It was a great week full of some awesome spirit.

Peace, Love, and Spartan Spirit!

::Growing Up::

The theme of the past six months of my life has been "Growing Up" or what I like to consider "Becoming an Adult". I think during this time I have shed more tears, thrown hands up in the air with frustration, and learned the value of the advice of those older than me.

Just in the past week I bought short term life insurance and bought a car!

But on top of all of this God has really been upsetting my life, but in a totally awesome way! I know there is a reason why He has me here at my job and I believe it is so that I can encourage, love, and listen to the ladies around me. I don't think I've truly understood the mission field around me until now. To be intentional and see others in the wonderful eyes of my Savior, is exactly what I've been waiting for. It is what I have been made for. It's what you have been made for too!

::Magnificence in Middle School::

Today is my first day nannying two of the sweetest girls ever.

I got settled in my new room.

Got a tour of the house.

Met some of their friends.

Went to Panda Express for dinner.

Came back and got ready for bed.

It was that easy.

The ease is not what matters though. It's that God has placed me in this family to love on them. I'm so excited to see what makes both of these girls tick. To encourage. To wipe tears. To help.

Thank you God for blessing me by allowing me to be part of their lives.

::Too Many Great Things At Once::

I am blessed. And Glory goes all to God on this one, because if I do anything at all, it usually messes everything up.

As for just some of the blessings:

• I get to spend at least one more year at the university that I attended, but now I work there!
• I will also be starting a nannying position and getting to love and invest in some incredible middle school girls.
• Everyone should check out my professional blogging debut.. @ My First Apartment
• Life should be super interesting as now I have two awesome room mates, A and T.
• The school year is about to start! That means I get the opportunity to love a whole bunch of college students.
• I just became a member of The Journey . And I am stoked to start serving there!

Growing up is a scary, exhilarating, and liberating time. God is revealing things to me everday, from how selfish and sheltered I am to how to vulnerable I must become to be used by Him.

Peace, Love, and Coconuts!

::It's Official::

I am officially one of the worst bloggers ever. I have been neglecting this outlet in the worst of ways. But no longer. My life has started with a fresh slate.

In the last year...

• I graduated.
• Was in a relationship
• Was a Student Teacher
• Got a 'big girl' job
• and the newest thing....got my first apartment!

I can't even begin to explain how BLESSED I am. There have been great times and hard times, but seeing God's hand on it all is incredible.

I am terrified and renewed in this process, please keep on checking this blog for installments of the crazy life and times of a new college-grad, apartment-living, vulnerable-being young lady.

::Tea and Raindrops::

I was sitting indian style on my plush bed and thinking about life. Do you ever just stop and think about that? I guess I become much more philosophical when it is raining outside and I am sipping on Numi earl grey tea but I realized I don't stop and reflect on the things that God has given me that truly makes me smile. So I will indulge:

A great one to begin with is....

A luke warm cup of Numi earl grey tea

New experiences

Spending time with friends

20 questions

Playing Games (I love cards)

Consistent weather (unlike STL)

Music (every type)

Sunglasses

The perfect Bible verse at that moment

God's promises

Flowers (any kind except roses)

Sun bathing

Great exercise

Bodies of water

Traveling

Reading

Inside jokes 

Being outside (camping, walking, etc)

Playing sports (I most recently attempted cricket)

There are so much more but I just wanted to name a few. I hope you can enjoy one of these beautiful things with me sometime.

::Bring on the Sun::

Summer is finally here! Wow this year was so much fun and so much work! I can't begin to explain all of the things that I learned. It would blow your mind! :-) But now it is summer time and I just love summer time. I have a room all to myself, which I am still working on setting up exactly how I want. I work as many hours as I can get my hands on. I learn so much about myself and have extra time to just chill. This summer I am working on routines. I want to get into a work out routine, a wake up routine and focusing on God routine. I hope I haven't bitten off more than I can chew! 

::Keeping My Head Above Water::

School is almost over. Yes my junior (pseudo senior) year is almost at it's demise. I have prospered and struggled. Focused on Tasks and relationships. Loved few and loved many. And now I am directionless. I am waiting, still. Actually I'm being pretty patient, this surprises me. I want to have my entire future planned out but alas it is not, and that is okay! This summer will give me time to enjoy what God has for me right now. I will be very busy working as I am applying for different off campus jobs in addition to my on campus ones. I hope to find myself, as I will be all by my lonesome in the dorms. I plan to work hard, laugh hard, exercise hard, and play hard. I hope to find routine as during the school year I am just trying to tread water to accomplish all that I do. There are many parts that this routine must have and I will let you know if they all get fit in.

Oh interesting news today.....I'm a Junior Marshall, again. It is sortive like when you get held back a grade. So I will get to "walk" at graduation three years in a row. I'm just that "special". (that made me giggle)

that is really all the fantastic news I have to report...now signing off from my nearest Starbucks.

::Pensive::

Oh that feeling that one has when standing at that fork in the road has been lurking over me for about a week now. I'll be honest, I have no idea what to do. I have two "professions" that I could choose. One is the future that I have had since a little girl, to love on students and prepare them for the future. The other is one that I have learned to love, and has the same goal of loving on students and preparing them for the future. One has a definite opening when I graduate, with a retirement plan and excellent benefits. The other is one that I will have to work for to get a job, but feel worth and accomplishment by getting there. One is terrifying, and full of disbelief in myself. The other is exciting and so rewarding. One can be found anywhere in many different outlets. The other is specific and may cause me to relocate. One makes very little pay. The other makes even less. So as you see, I don't know what to do.

This feeling has caused me much turmoil in the past couple of weeks. I know what my "heart" wants to do, and I know what my "brain" tells me to do. As for the direction God is having me go, as of yet, I don't know. I do have faith that he will open the necessary doors to make whatever His will is happen. But this means patience and lots of it. I don't know what I am supposed to do before and after I graduate college. I don't even know what major I want. So I stare at the two roads before me and wait.

I will leave you with as much hope as I have: "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "Plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future..." Jeremiah 29:11 (yes this is taken a little out of context but tonight it speaks volumes.)

::Fried College Kids::

When coming to the south, I am often greeted by the views of Fried Chicken stores usually named ridiculous things like "Fry-daddy", but today it was definitely fried college students as each one of us are burnt. But it was totally worth it. I spent the day on the beach, enjoying the sun and surf. Then after we spent our sun time we went to LuLu's for dinner. This place was so adorable (and showed a beautiful sunset, as you can see to the left) and had tasty marina food. Also we found an artist there who put henna on almost all of the ladies on the trip. I have a neat little marking on my foot. It is my first henna tat, and I love it. I believe tomorrow holds tons of shopping, we shall see how that goes! 

::Here Comes the Sun::

First of all this trip has been in the works for a couple of years. We have been trying to convince our boss that a spring break trip would be great for the student body. This year we succeeded and made out way to Orange Beach, Alabama. The trip there was so crazy, as it was a 14 hour drive in a big MBU bus. We left at midnight and got here around 2 pm. There were some crazy times on the way here, lets just say college kids awake in a trucker station at 3 am is never a good thing. We finally arrived at our hotel and let's just say this hotel is incredible! Like one of the best Hotels I have ever stayed in. Then we jumped in the heated pool and enjoyed the Alabaman sun. Soon after that us ladies got all dolled up and went "out". It got a little crazy but we had a good time. Finally we ended the evening with a relaxing walk on the beach. It is so nice not to have to be a certain place at a certain time and to have time to just have fun. This Spring Break will be a blast, more to come later.